People have said that getting boys ready for school and finally out the door in the morning is like herding cats. Not really. Herding cats has got to be waaaay easier than this. Boys can play an entire NFL regular season, playoff games, and Super Bowl on Wii football before school, but cannot put their socks on. Why is it impossible for boys to make any morning progress whatsoever without a personal scheduling assistant reminding them to stay on task at 45-second intervals? Ain’t nobody got time for that…
Things my boys have done this week instead of getting ready for school, or in the middle of getting ready for school:
- Hold empty laundry basket with both arms and wiggle all around while watching a tiny rubber ball roll around in the bottom. See dad glaring and yell “LOOK AT THIS, THIS IS AWESOME!!!”
- Put on pants and belt, fail to buckle belt. Crouch in corner and continue building lego police station that has been under construction for 1.5 weeks. Still no socks.
- Told to go to bathroom and clean breakfast residue from face…spend next four minutes attempting to fill toothpaste tube with water.
The longer I live, the more I am convinced that the battle of Armageddon will not be the forces of good and evil dueling over the fate of humanity, but rather the uniting of parents all over the world in one final attempt to make their sons put on socks before school.